Jokes!

[madchafer]

Post your jokes here, and see who does the best!

My Formal Character, is a mexican child, called "Juan" And Juan's friends, are all retarded

Lets start shall we?!



*One day, Juan must pass his homework before its overdue*

Teacher: JUAN! Why can't you follow any of my instructions?! If you don't pass your homework tomorrow, you'll surely redo this grade! Ask your parents for help this time....
Juan: Yes Maam!

*Back at home*
Juan: Mama! I'm home! Whats the answer for number one?!
Mother: *Cooking Fried Chicken* *Oil lands on arm* AGHH! WHAT THE F*CK! BLACK NIGGA NIGGA NIGGA! ASSHOLE!
Juan: Okay...What.....Black....Nigga.....Asshole...Thanks Mama!

Juan: Papa! Whats the answer for number two ?
Dad: *In the toilet* I'm sitting in the bowl! I'm sitting in the bowl!
Juan: Okay...Sitting.....the.....bowl....Okay! Thanks papa!

Juan: Bro! Whats the answer for number three?
Brother: *Reciting a school play* I shall return!
Juan: Okay, I shall return....Thanks bro!

*Back at school*
Teacher: Juan! Did you do your homework?!
Juan: Yes Maam! And my family helped me!
Teacher: Good, what is number one?
Juan: AGHH! NIGGA! NIGGA! NIGGA! ASSHOLE!
Teacher: JUAN! Sit down immediately!
Juan: *Proceeds to number two* I'm sitting in the bowl! I'm sitting in the bowl!
Teacher: Go To the Principal's office right now!!
Juan: *Proceeds to number three* I shall return!!
Juan: Is it all correct teacher?!
Teacher: JUST GET OUT YOU FILTHY PIG!

[bloodstrikez]

3/10.. Not really funny.

[Husker]

[Tomatha]

3/10.. Not really funny.

I'm not sure who the ideal audience for this joke is...

[ArnoldElfman]

I don't get it.

[EliasDaniel]

#plugin("object", "export", "Roblox Mesh", ".mesh");
#file($output, "text");
#return($result);

file $output;
int $result;
object $obj;
shape $shape, $shapes[1], $childShapes[1];
tridata $data;
material $mat;
int $numFaces;
point3 $point, $normal, $color;
point2 $uv;
int $i;
int $j;
int $index, $mIndex;
int $count;
float $gCol;
string $nm;
string $newName;
float4x4 $tMatrix;

$nm = $output.GetRoot();

$obj = project.curObject;
$output.print("version 1.00\n");
$obj.GetShapes($childShapes);
$shapes.size = 0;
while($childShapes.size > 0)
{
$shapes.push($childShapes.pop());
}
while($shapes.size > 0)
{
$shape = $shapes.pop();
$shape = $shape.ConvertToMesh();
$data = $shape.GetTriangleData();
$numFaces = $data.GetNumTriangles();
$tMatrix = $shape.GetGlobalTransform();
$output.print("%d\n",$numFaces);
for $i = 0 to $numFaces - 1 do {
for $j = 0 to 2 step 1 do {
$index = $data.GetIndex(($i*3)+$j);
$point = $data.GetPoint($index);
$point = $tMatrix.Proect($point);
$normal = $data.GetNormal($index);
$uv = $data.GetTexCoord($index);
$output.print("[%.6g, %.6g, %.6g]", $point.x, $point.y, $point.z);
$output.print("[%.5f, %.5f, %.5f]", $normal.x, $normal.y, $normal.z);
$output.print("[%.5f, %.5f, 0]", $uv.x, $uv.y);
}
}
}


$result = 1;


See what i did wrong that a funny joke ehh

[killingsucker77]

#plugin("object", "export", "Roblox Mesh", ".mesh");
#file($output, "text");
#return($result);

file $output;
int $result;
object $obj;
shape $shape, $shapes[1], $childShapes[1];
tridata $data;
material $mat;
int $numFaces;
point3 $point, $normal, $color;
point2 $uv;
int $i;
int $j;
int $index, $mIndex;
int $count;
float $gCol;
string $nm;
string $newName;
float4x4 $tMatrix;

$nm = $output.GetRoot();

$obj = project.curObject;
$output.print("version 1.00\n");
$obj.GetShapes($childShapes);
$shapes.size = 0;
while($childShapes.size > 0)
{
$shapes.push($childShapes.pop());
}
while($shapes.size > 0)
{
$shape = $shapes.pop();
$shape = $shape.ConvertToMesh();
$data = $shape.GetTriangleData();
$numFaces = $data.GetNumTriangles();
$tMatrix = $shape.GetGlobalTransform();
$output.print("%d\n",$numFaces);
for $i = 0 to $numFaces - 1 do {
for $j = 0 to 2 step 1 do {
$index = $data.GetIndex(($i*3)+$j);
$point = $data.GetPoint($index);
$point = $tMatrix.Proect($point);
$normal = $data.GetNormal($index);
$uv = $data.GetTexCoord($index);
$output.print("[%.6g, %.6g, %.6g]", $point.x, $point.y, $point.z);
$output.print("[%.5f, %.5f, %.5f]", $normal.x, $normal.y, $normal.z);
$output.print("[%.5f, %.5f, 0]", $uv.x, $uv.y);
}
}
}


$result = 1;


See what i did wrong that a funny joke ehh

What"s this, It makes the reader crazy,

[machstormer]

This thread is labled "Jokes!"

I must be using the wrong dictionary.
According to 4 different dictionaries that I have checked, jokes are supposed to have at least a little bit of humor.

[BarrettM82A1]

$point = $data.GetPoint($index);
$point = $tMatrix.Proect($point);
$normal = $data.GetNormal($index);

You spelled Project Wrong
I dont get it

[GOD_OF_PAIN]

I have my own joke too, check it out

Teacher: Ok class tonight's homework is to study about all the birds we learned about
Student: Alright, I'll do my best!
Teacher: It's due in 2 days

2 DAYS LATER......

Student: Hey I studied about the birds! I learned what kind of feathers each bird has, how to tell which is which, and a lot more! I just know i'm going to get a good grade!
Teacher: Very good! *reveals pictures of bird legs* Can you tell me the names of the birds by looking at their legs?
Student: ..... WHAT?! SO I JUST WENT GO READ IN MY BOOK ABOUT ALL THE INFOMATION ABOUT ALL THE BIRDS, AND YOU GIVE ME THIS!? YOU GIVE ME WHAT THEIR NAMES ARE BY LOOKING AT THIER LEGS!?? WHAT THE HECK!?
Teacher: That's it, go to the principal's office right now! And you know I can give you an F right?
Student: Go ahead I don't care, give me an F *walks through door*
Teacher: Hold on! What's your name?
Student: *puts up leg* You tell me!!


I heard this story from a paster (LOL did I spell it right?) from my church, and it was his birthday, so he told the church a joke. Anyways I thought it was funny, but tell me what you think

[madchafer]

I have my own joke too, check it out

Teacher: Ok class tonight's homework is to study about all the birds we learned about
Student: Alright, I'll do my best!
Teacher: It's due in 2 days

2 DAYS LATER......

Student: Hey I studied about the birds! I learned what kind of feathers each bird has, how to tell which is which, and a lot more! I just know i'm going to get a good grade!
Teacher: Very good! *reveals pictures of bird legs* Can you tell me the names of the birds by looking at their legs?
Student: ..... WHAT?! SO I JUST WENT GO READ IN MY BOOK ABOUT ALL THE INFOMATION ABOUT ALL THE BIRDS, AND YOU GIVE ME THIS!? YOU GIVE ME WHAT THEIR NAMES ARE BY LOOKING AT THIER LEGS!?? WHAT THE HECK!?
Teacher: That's it, go to the principal's office right now! And you know I can give you an F right?
Student: Go ahead I don't care, give me an F *walks through door*
Teacher: Hold on! What's your name?
Student: *puts up leg* You tell me!!


I heard this story from a paster (LOL did I spell it right?) from my church, and it was his birthday, so he told the church a joke. Anyways I thought it was funny, but tell me what you think

Not bad, in fact! I love the story! Who'd know that Priests/Pastors can be funny?

[madchafer]

And heres my joke if its American version: (Meme Version)

[Metalmorphosist]

And heres my joke if its American version: (Meme Version)

BWAHAHAHA THIS GOT ME LAUGHING SO HARD XD

[EliasDaniel]

$point = $data.GetPoint($index);
$point = $tMatrix.Proect($point);
$normal = $data.GetNormal($index);

You spelled Project Wrong
I dont get it

THAT THE JOKE LOLOLOLOL

[Contracter]

A boy goes to school with carrots in his ears and the teacher stops writing on the board and says why do you have carrots in your ears and the boy says "what?"

[BarrettM82A1]

Q. What's the integral of 1/cabin with respect to cabin?






A. A houseboat

[Contressa]

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

The Holocaust.


___________________

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
I have a gun.
Get in the van.

___________________

what's brown and sticky?

A stick.

___________________

Figured id get some anti-humor in here. My favorite ones the stick one! haha

[Contracter]

What do
you call a Eskimo
flying a plane
A Pilot

didnt want to say some other race and offend anyone

[BarrettM82A1]

Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?




A: A ferrous wheel

[Konrad]

Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

Can confirm.
http://funhoo.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/Ferrous-Wheel.jpg
So much for a delocalised ring system...
______________________________________________________________________________________________________

Q: Why did the cute little monkey fall out of the tree?



A: She was dead.

[penhead]

lmfao .. xDD

take one from sheldon; A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a drink, the bartender replies "for you, no charge" ba-da-sha//

it's funny cuz neutrons don't have legs....

[ataak]

Q.Why was six afraid of seven?
A.Because seven is a registered six offender.


Knock knock.
Who's there?
Europe.
Europe who?
No you're a poo!


Q.What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
A.Virgin mobile!


heehe!

[ataak]

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
I have a gun.
Get in the van.

___________________

Ohh this is delightfully awful... Contressa wins!

[madchafer]

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
I have a gun.
Get in the van.

___________________

Ohh this is delightfully awful... Contressa wins!

Lawl!

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I have a d*ck
Get in the pedo-van


Roses are red
Violets are red
Daisies are red
My garden is on fire now...


Roses are red
Violets are blue
You look like a monkey
F*ck you

[Sasuke]

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
I have a gun.
Get in the van.

___________________

Ohh this is delightfully awful... Contressa wins!

Lawl!

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I have a d*ck
Get in the pedo-van


Roses are red
Violets are red
Daisies are red
My garden is on fire now...


Roses are red
Violets are blue
You look like a monkey
F*ck you

How about "and" in front of f*ck you?